just like my days

ten batches.
6 sponsorings.
1 staffing.
9/10 batches attended. 
8 givings.
10+ people recruited
4 senas attended
2/3 of the people i met in college came from these "kulto" kuno


all because of One Weekend I took 10 batches ago.
because of one shout, one commitment
one call from above.

my Days with The Lord

the life-changing weekend.

god. its been ten batches. wow. ten batches. that time i didnt know who kris rea is. or mami olive, or emai, or chris ramirez, or enrico, or penn or chudz, or carlo. and it was a long long ride.

a lot has happened. everything changed. from a guy whose problem was just his lovelife to someone who has a larger-than-life dream with matters more complicated than just relationships and a student's life being governed by an unending quest for numbers just to pass.

life has been a lot complicated. before i just know that the large intestine has a duodenum, jejenun and an ileum. now, there are  parts of the duodenum pala, and not to mention its detailed structure that varies every layer for every part. my prayers before were just, 'sana hindi umulan' or 'sana madagdagan na allowance ko'.. now its like "god, let me pass psych". "give me a sign"."how am i supposed to gather this sum of money?"

life has been a lot complicated. but then, i had been a lot simpler. it became easier to make me smile. before it would take a big fat ass joke to make me laugh. but now, even a baby saying "gagu" este "mama" will sometimes make my day. before i was wishing for a kick-ass beautiful girlfriend. i had it before. but i never was contented. but now, even though i dont have a girlfriend, anjan naman si Lord... yuck ang baduy. pero, in a way, totoo naman. ever since days i talk to him always. and he talks back in different ways. minsan minumura ko siya, minsan natutuwa ako sa kanya. my relationship with Him is really something im proud of.

before, id panic for a short quiz, but now, even though i have biochem exams coming in the next  hours, one sip of coffee would calm me down as i feel in the warmness out of the cold hard headed night. well, but that doesnt mean my grades are better. wahaha

as life was getting harder. my approach for it was getting simpler and simpler, until it comes down to one single solution. one single essential thing to answer the freakin complicated puzzle of the 4th day.

LOVE

if i love what im doing, studying wont be a burden.
i love days thats why even though i dont have a car this weekend, i still tried my best to go on the three days.
if i love serving people, it  wouldnt be a burden for me to wake up early in the morning just to participate in medical missions which we dont get paid for.

like one song in days said, "love is the answer, to all our questions."

god it was hard for me to fathom that song before. but right now, its just so simple and pure and is just around. had always been just around. that all i need to face the world, is a little love in my heart.

and i know that that would be enough to move mountains, make me fly, and heck, make me pass Psychiatry.

so... ten batches.  2 years since the commitment, since i doubt, wept, trusted, and now, live.

i always come back to my Days. to the clouded skies of antipolo, the cold breeze of alpadi air, the sweet longanisa i had on the sunday breakfast, the songs iv heard on the second night, the feel of fresh rain on the first night. the gentle song of day by day, i just close my eyes and remember them like it was just happening again right in front of me. everything was so perfect, so good, so high. and after that, everything seems to be alright again...

days with the lord: an experience you wont forget, a decision you wont regret.

"and when the times get tough. and the world simply falls apart
ill come back to you, and let each tear i cry
wash away the fear i have inside
just like my days, my days with you oh Lord."+bil

+ basta ikaw...

"Look at all my Trials and Tribulations, Sinking in a gentle pool of wine"

in Days, we gather into a beautiful place, in the name of one person, and concentrate to give out all the help and love we can give to make the next set of Dazers feel the love everyone felt during our time. In there, we shut out everything else. School, Work, Fears, Low Grades, Family Problems, and use the weekend to renew our faith, our commitment, and ourselves.

For me, the weekend never fails to take me apart from all the anxieties i feel. with each song, activity, talk, or even just the silent moments there... it all makes me forget that i'm Karl the Med Student, or Karl the Eldest in the family. It's just Karl. No titles or brands whatsoever.

I needed the Days this weekend. Its one of the weekends that i needed to stop everything in this fast paced life and just focus and refocus and take a time off for me to think, and recharge this tired mind of mine. nagmulto daw si Stephen, buti hindi sakin. Sobrang thanks din sa Family ni Stephen for the Great food na binigay nila samin, (waaa crabs!). Thanks to Ayeen and Dave. Thanks to the Core group. Thanks to the staff especially Gayle, Tin and Amil. Thanks to Jhun and Joann the J&J/R&R, thanks kay at Chel, Dorx, Kukoi, Burnz, and of Course, to Jess.

for the wonderful weekend.

congrats to Jane, BJ, Pia, Julia and Pia.


+bastaikawlord.

"Morning comes and I must go, day is breaking yonder.

After all the places I have been, now I’m going home."

nakakamiss.

basta ikaw, stephen

sorry tol, ngayon lang nagka-time magblog. haha. panu ba yan, dwtl63 na next week.

its been 9 batches since i became a dazer, been a candidate, sponsor, staffer, driver, grabber, runner, proxy, and  giver. dwtl has changed my life and had always been there for me to run to, or as a refuge when im down... i always listen to dwtl songs i illegally downloaded and ripped the cd that i borrowed from stephen last batch. he said its illegal, but he still gave me the cd. haha.

...

dwtl 54
my batch.

19 candidates with Gayle, and Kris, Emai, Enrico, Chuds, Penn, Dkee, Aina, Dyan, Ysa, Thea, Venus, Carlo, and others i forgot. haha. with Kris and Olive as our R&R

you were the last speaker. the last talk, and i can still remember the question you asked our group that day, "How do you feel ngayon at matatapos na ang Days?"

and I answered, "I Feel so High." In your talk you talked about your mum, your family, and days. always days.

since then ive been noticing you walking around the corridors of main, greeting greg, and seems like sobrang pakalatkalat ka nun. haha.

dwtl57

i heard you singing the last supper. that's when i appreciated the song a lot more cause for the first time i understood the lyrics. haha.

dwtl58

i was a staff. and you were one of the heads. pinagalitan mo nga ako nun eh. haha. kasi napakadisorganized ko at may nabuhos akong mainit na GC. hahaha. "O KARL? ANO NA GAGAWIN MO DUN SA NABUHOS MO?!? BAT MO INIWAN??!" hahaha

"karl, mali ka. dapat ganto. dapat ganyan. Linisin mo nga ang util room, ang dumi dumi!"

"Karl, samahan mo ako, Duwag ako, diyan ka lang sa tabi, wag ka nang bumalik sa Control, hintayon mo na kaming matapos"

dwtl59

you were drenched in the rain. but you didnt mind. you thanked me for bringing the 8 candidates to antipolo.

dwtl61

you were scared of being assigned to a dark place because you know ghosts loom in Xavier.

dwtl62

my brother's batch. your last batch.

pinalo mo yung pwet ko nun at sabi mo, "O, lumalaki ka nanaman ah.. hahaha? Utol mo anjan?"

it felt weird because like what i tell everyone, we're not really close. and i felt there's a glow in you. you lent me the xavier dwtl cd, and of course i didnt know how to react, hindi nga tayo close diba? bakit moko pinapahiram ng CD? haha.

"Sabihin mo sa kapatid mo pag nakakaramdam siya ng multo wag niyang sasabihin ah?"

the first and last time we talked deeply was after the BIL Night. You gave words to me on how to handle my Brother/s, your dreams on becoming an opthalmologist, on not Joining a Frat, on our Days Experiences so Far, how Days had changed our lives, and how we help others change their lives by giving all the help we can give in DWTL.

you told me about your BIL night experience. tangina kinilabutan ako nung kinwento mo yun. you told me how sometimes, Givers like us are "Posessed" by Jess and how he uses us to give his message to the candis. We shared stuffs about the candidates we've met. And you said that the last Candidate you Gave was one of the best BILs youve made.

on the last day, you wore black. wala lang. hahahaha.

batch dinner. you approached me and jhun, and said, "Oi, mga future classmates ko to!"

ust med

The last time i saw you, you were with Jane, "Stephen! Andito si Doc Bix! Nakita mo?"

"oo, andun, may kausap eh"

...

and that was it. the last of you.

pucha andrama. pero, yun eh.

Ganto pala mamatayan ng kaibigan. Hindi nga kami close pero tangina nahirapan pa rin akong iprocess sa utak ko ang mga nangyari. how much more pa pala kung ang namatay ay isang taong mas close pa sakin. juskopo. ganto pala. ang hirap pala, masakit. masaklap. ang hirap tanggapin...

so... dwtl 63 na. another Antipolo Days Batch. Wag ka sanang magmulto dude, tangina takot din ako sa multo, hindi ko lang pinakita sa iyo dati haha. Stephen, kung asan ka man, salamat. Salamat sa Days Experience, sa pagtulog gawin ng matino ang mga trabaho ko sa days. Thanks Tol,

Basta Ikaw, Stephen.

"Then when we retire, we can write the gospels and we all talk about it when me die" -the last supper